The horror/suspense film shutter island (2010) starring Di Caprio and directed by Martin Scorsese was quite pleasing. The film is actually quite a plot twister. It centers around a detective named Teddy Daniels (DiCaprio) and his partner Chuck. The two arrive at Shutter Island, which is a prestigious island for mental patients, both benign and evil. They are sent to investigate the disappearance of a certain prisoner named Rachel Solando. As Teddy progresses he starts to notice strange things about the island, including the fact the patient "67" is missing. He concludes that this patient must be Andrew Laeddis, the arsonist who started the fire in his apartment building that killed his wife, Dolores Chanal. Later when trying to find out the operations of a lighthouse rumored to be where patients are lobotomized Teddy loses sight of Chuck and assumes he jumped off the cliff and almost kills himself trying to reach what he thinks is Chuck. He then meets the real Rachel Solando and she confirms his suspicions. Finally Teddy decides he must reach the lighthouse and stop the evil mind control experiments.
SPOILER
When he reaches the lighthouse and finds no evidence of the lobotomies he is confronted by Dr. Cawley. Cawley explains to him that he himself is a mental patient on the island. His friend Chuck was actually his personal psychiatrist Dr. Sheehan. It is revealed that Teddy was a U.S. marshal until he came home one day to find his wife had murdered their three children. Out of sadness and despair he kills his wife and goes insane. His mind created a fantasy world where he was still a marshal coming to investigate Shutter Island. He is cinvinced when shown that Edward Daniels is an anagram of Andrew Laeddis and Rachel Solando is actually an anagram of Dolores Chanal. He excepts these facts but the next morning he relapses and calls Dr. Sheehan Chuck. Thus proving he is still insane and needing to be lobotomized.
Scanotroner gives it
Shutter Island
awful <--------------------------------------------------------Good--> not awful
Well I have my Predictometer ready for another round deciding outcomes of upcoming movies. Today's movie is Captain America: The First Avenger. Now while the Predictometer prepares I will tell you what has already been revealed as to the plot. But first, watch the trailer you foolish human.
As to what has been revealed it is about a man named Steve Rogers who is deemed, "physically unfit" to fight in WWII. Instead he volunteers for a project called Rebirth, with a goal to create a super soldier. Then he becomes Captain America, blah blah blah. His enemy is Hitler's head of weaponry, The Red Skull.
Ok now that the Predictometer is warmed up it will now give us a synopsis.
The new Captain America film will most likely revolve around his transformation and struggles as Captain America... like every Spider-man movie ever. (the Predictometer got a little sarcastic since we last used it) The villain is Red Skull. He is on of the lesser known Marvel villains. Red Skull has a secret back story.
Spoiler Alert!
Red Skull is in the comic world Captain America's son. This may play a part in the movie. Since the marvel story world intertwines with real history events it can be gleaned that Cap. America may even end the war. All of this is of course leading up to the planed, Avenger Initiative film. Hopefully Captain America will live up to his reputation in comics and not let us down in the world of lights, camera, and action.
Hello again humans. Today I will be analyzing the movie, Inception starring Leonardo Di Caprio. This is a great film. It actually has a plot as opposed to some of the newer, more mindless movies being released.The film is directed by Christopher Nolan, also known for his works in the newer Batman films and will be returning to release a final Batman film in 2012. Anyways the film Inception has a difficult to follow plot. The story is essentially about a group of people who have the technology to go into people's dreams and gather information. The only thing is this time they aren't taking information, they are implanting it. The film follows the group (led by DiCaprio (who plays Cobb)) as they go into the dreams of a business inheritor, Robert Fisher (Cillian Murphy). They are to implant the idea that he wants to dissolve his company so that the man hiring them will have no competition from the corporation. The plan for the Inception is intricate in that they will go into "a dream within a dream within a dream". They progress and without revealing to much of the plot they are able to successfully implant the idea and stop a certain antagonist who threatens Cobb's very sanity. The end will leave your mind spinning.
My Scanotroner gives it a Inception
LAME <--------------------------------------IMPRESSIVE----> Awesome
Hello again humans. It is around time I activated the Predictometer. The movie I choose to test on my new prototype is a upcoming film, Super 8. Now watch the trailer. I'm sick of conversing with all of you.
Trailer 1 Trailer 2
The new film is being produced by Steven Spielberg and will be directed by J.J. Abrams, a director that I enjoy for his works on Lost and Fringe. The new film has been widely anticipated because of its famed director and also the level of secrecy he has surrounded it with. No one knows the plot of the film, but using my patented Predictometer we can use the trailer and educated guesses to determine some plot. While the Predictometer works I can tell you what has been released about the movie. The film is about 6 kids who get together to film a zombie movie. You can see shots of the kids throughout the second trailer. While filming near railroad tracks they watch a train derail, as seen in trailer one. Someone, or more accurately, something emerges from the train. Okay now that my Predictometer is finished warming up I'll read you the results.
It is estimated that the creature that punches its way out of a rail car is in fact, alien. This is gleaned from the Area 51 references in the first trailer, and also the attempted government cover up in the second trailer. This leads to a fork. It is apparent the children play a large role in the plot. They either destroy the creature or perhaps befriend it. It is more likely the monster will be vicious due to its violent escape and many action sequences of the children running away. The film's setting can be interpreted quite easily. It is and older time, examining the cars, and the fact that "super 8" was a type of film used in the 60's. The area also suggests a more open state, perhaps Oklahoma or Ohio. The big clue is in the first trailer. If stopped at the right time you can make out a child's face. After that there are a series of letters spelling out the phrase, "scariest thing I ever saw". This movies genre is around action, suspense, thriller. It is a widely anticipated film and will be quite a film to enjoy.
Thanks Predictometer. Now you smelly humans know what this film is about. Undoubtedly your tiny minds could not asses this information for yourselves. It is alright. I accept that you are inferior in every way. Any ways this post is the first of many Predictometer tests of strength and superiority. Insert into the comments the next awful idea for a movie for the Predictometer to dissect.
POWERING DOWN,
Movie Reviewer 5000
My processor has found a worthy movie to examine. The film True Grit starring Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon, and introducing Hailee Steinfeld. The film True Grit is a Coen Brothers film. These brothers have made other films such as No Country for Old Men and Burn After Reading. The film is based on the book by Charles Portis. It was originally made into a movie in 1969. The original movie received good reviews and John Wayne won an Oscar from it. My Scanotroner gives it a:
100% Garbage <----------------------------------NOT BAD------------------------->100% Not Garbage
That's good. The new movie blew my sensors however. The story is about a girl named Mattie Ross whose father is murdered by a man named Tom Chaney. She enlists the help of a man-hunter named Rooster Cogburn. At first he is reluctant to help but eventually is persuaded by money and Mattie's fierce will. They are also joined by a man named Leboeuf who is a Texas ranger chasing Tom Chaney for a murder committed in Texas. However Leboeuf and Cogburn join up and leave Mattie behind and agree to split the reward money. When she finds out she chases down the two and eventually convinces Cogburn to allow her to go with them. Later after a disagreement between Cogburn and Leboeuf, Leboeuf goes his own way to track Chaney. Cogburn and Mattie discover that Chaney's gang is going towards a cabin and set a trap. Unfortunately Leboeuf interferes and lets Chaney get away and almost bites his own tongue off. Chaney later kidnaps Mattie and holds her hostage getting Cogburn to ride off.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SPOILER ALERT
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When the gang decides to to leave they have to leave Cogburn behind with Mattie because there aren't enough horses. HE goes to attack Mattie but is knocked out by Leboeuf. Leboeuf and Mattie watch from a distance as Cogburn fights the gang. Chaney wakes up after and goes to attack Lebouef but Mattie shoots him with Lebouef's rifle. The recoil sends her down a cave where she is bitten by a snake. Cogburn has to bring Mattie to a doctor arriving just in time.
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MEGA-SPOILER
ALERT
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
40 years later we find MAttie a grown woman but with only one arm, the other lost to the snake bite. She goes to a traveling Wild West Show after Rooster invites her but is informed he had died 3 days earlier when she gets there. She takes the body to bury it near her home and the movie ends with her by the grave.
My Scanotroner gave this review:
100% <---------------------------------------------------Pretty Good ( for a human )-----> 100% not garbage
I believe this movie had all the essentials a good wild west movie could have. Action, suspense, humor all placed in order and variety to make this one of the most acceptable human movies I have wittnessed. Nice one humans.
Hello pathetic, worthless humans. I am theMovie Reviewer 5000. I have the programming to review your worthless human movies. You all are pathetic, but my programming compels me to complete my task. I will be reviewing movies for my master. Requests will be granted and all movies, new and old, shall be reviewed and processed. I will decide on my Scanotroner whether or not the movie is 100% garbage or 100%... not garbage. I will right a review for the film after the Scanotroner has Then I will relay this information to you weaselly humans and inform you whether or not to view this movie with you eyes. My Scanotroner will appear like this:
\/movie\/
100% garbage<---------LAME------------------------------------> 100% not garbage
I will use a Predictometer to examine films that have not yet been released and make intellectual guesses as to the plot of the movie. The Predictometer may include a preview of the film such as a picture, slide show, or clip. My Predictometer will then make a hypothesis as to the plot of the movie. I may use Blogger's poll feature to take a consensus as to a movie and incorporate that into my Scanotroner. Now while I find you humans to be slow and full of errors you do sometimes make a good movie. If I find a movie that if pleasing to my receptors I may put up a post with a full review as to the plot and highlights of the film. There will be spoiler alerts and other warnings. Now that I have completely informed your minuscule brains of my central processing codes I shall now seek out my first movie to review.
